Right now I do not have the money to afford cello lessons. I have not had the money for a long time and unless things change, I won't. What I do have are years of training and skill and professional experience as a performer and teacher. This means that to a certain extent I can teach myself. A good private lesson is about raising awareness while pushing the student further & being supportive at the same time.
Some people set goals before they practice. I usually look for something that's wrong or not working and then try to fix it. At previous points I've set goals and used practice routines. It may be helpful to start doing that again.
Today my practice focused very heavily on the alignment of my left arm to the cello & keeping it consistent (particularly when playing on the 4th finger or shifting) & on using the whole arm for vibrato instead of just the forearm.
I started out watching and trying to imitate Amit Peled's video of the prayer. I learned a ton from this ... it led me to work on the alignment and vibrato. This has in turn helped my shifting, intonation & connecting notes. A lot of the work I did was slow & step by step (going at the speed of thought) & a lot of it involved going back and checking and re-checking (because the whole aim of this is consistency & the ability to do anything on command).
Some general tips and thoughts that came out of this lesson:
-Vibrato with the Arm, not the wrist
-Vibrato with forearm for quieter passages (generally requires more tension)
-Always play with a big sound/project
-Don't get stuck
-Every practice has to be a lesson
-I have to be my own teacher
-Left Hand has to down before the right hand can act
I have a list of cello technical exercises that I've kept for a while (mostly areas I want to work on or skills I want to develop), I'm going to make sure to refer in future lessons.
Friday, March 11, 2011
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Technical Talk
As a result of video myself, I discovered something pretty interesting that explains some of the trouble and insecurity I have with playing the cello:
I break the alignment of my arm to the cello a lot. Particularly when I play on my 4th finger or shift. This is something I had pointed out to me very quickly a while ago, but recently I discovered vampyresonata (http://www.youtube.com/vampyresonata) girl & after watching her & every other cellist out there & notice that they all had this consistent position and ease/strength/directness of playing, I finally put 2 & 2 together ...
I love the way Vampyre Sonata plays, especially with her left hand - it's so direct and structured and accurate & it produces a great sound
Teaching advice for Masterclasses or private lessons: Mirrors are great tools. What I think I'm doing from behind the cello and what I'm actually doing are often different. A mirror shows me what I'm actually doing. Had somebody explained this to me with a mirror and taken 5 minutes to go over it with me, it would have stuck much, much more.
Some other things I've noticed are that my left hand thumb is often unbalanced or behind the first finger - particularly after shifting, my bow hand fingers are not bending enough. I'm also learning that there are times to tense more and times to relax more (particularl with the left hand).
Also, playing a piano dynamic still requires a firm left hand that fully stops the string ... this is what Irene Sharp means by left hand doesn't do dynamics (I think) ... What the left hand does alter is the tone.
I've discovered part of the secret to playing in tune (and this is something I was taught long ago) ... I need to hear/sing the part in my head *before* I'm playing it. This means I'm constantly thinking ahead (something I was telling a student in a lesson the other day & something Amit Peled talks about in his ICS interview)
Also, I have to start thinking about bow distribution as a means of expression a lot more & start mimicking other cellist's bow distribution, as well as their left hand.
Today I tried a new method of practicing, which basically meant that when learning a new piece, I stopped after sections and wrote down the problems and then continued (I would have then worked on them, but I only had an hour for this particular session & lots of tunes to get through).
I'm going to make it a point to blog regularly & discover new Youtube regularly and start reading peoples' blogs again (because I have to confess, Emily's is really the only one I've been reading regularly).
I am very stressed out (compared to my usual level of complete non-stressiness), but it's the kind that comes from working hard ... I need that right now!
I break the alignment of my arm to the cello a lot. Particularly when I play on my 4th finger or shift. This is something I had pointed out to me very quickly a while ago, but recently I discovered vampyresonata (http://www.youtube.com/vampyresonata) girl & after watching her & every other cellist out there & notice that they all had this consistent position and ease/strength/directness of playing, I finally put 2 & 2 together ...
I love the way Vampyre Sonata plays, especially with her left hand - it's so direct and structured and accurate & it produces a great sound
Teaching advice for Masterclasses or private lessons: Mirrors are great tools. What I think I'm doing from behind the cello and what I'm actually doing are often different. A mirror shows me what I'm actually doing. Had somebody explained this to me with a mirror and taken 5 minutes to go over it with me, it would have stuck much, much more.
Some other things I've noticed are that my left hand thumb is often unbalanced or behind the first finger - particularly after shifting, my bow hand fingers are not bending enough. I'm also learning that there are times to tense more and times to relax more (particularl with the left hand).
Also, playing a piano dynamic still requires a firm left hand that fully stops the string ... this is what Irene Sharp means by left hand doesn't do dynamics (I think) ... What the left hand does alter is the tone.
I've discovered part of the secret to playing in tune (and this is something I was taught long ago) ... I need to hear/sing the part in my head *before* I'm playing it. This means I'm constantly thinking ahead (something I was telling a student in a lesson the other day & something Amit Peled talks about in his ICS interview)
Also, I have to start thinking about bow distribution as a means of expression a lot more & start mimicking other cellist's bow distribution, as well as their left hand.
Today I tried a new method of practicing, which basically meant that when learning a new piece, I stopped after sections and wrote down the problems and then continued (I would have then worked on them, but I only had an hour for this particular session & lots of tunes to get through).
I'm going to make it a point to blog regularly & discover new Youtube regularly and start reading peoples' blogs again (because I have to confess, Emily's is really the only one I've been reading regularly).
I am very stressed out (compared to my usual level of complete non-stressiness), but it's the kind that comes from working hard ... I need that right now!
Is There No Standard Anymore?
I've been learning a lot over the past month or so since I've moved to New York.
A lot about people, about music, about myself, life, etc. Many of those lessons have come in the past 2 weeks through financial difficulty.
One of the most important ones came a few nights ago after seeing Zoe Keating & Todd Reynolds play. This lesson has actually been coming for a while & it started with me actually practicing again & actually recording some of my practice. However, the LPR show was really the catalyst of it. Meeting a lot of buskers has also been essential to this change.
I've learned that I need to hold myself to a higher standard - musically and as a person. I've accomplished a lot in the almost 7 years I've been playing cello. I have a lot to be proud of and a lot to value. I've affected and inspired and moved people in all sorts of settings. I've created music, I've learned to improvise and play different styles, I've written a solo album, which I'm going to record soon, played in orchestras, musicals, etc, etc. BUT there's a lot I haven't done ... there's still a ton I have to learn. I've met and watched so many talented people recently and there is a level of musicality and technical proficiency I have not achieved yet. I've met a lot of "amateurs" who actually have a better technique than me or are better sight-readers or whatever. They arent' quite so boasty about what they do.
So I've realized, I need to hold myself to a higher standard. I need to practice more, I need to practice better, I need to record myself all the time & all in all I need to output higher than I do now. This includes things like always showing up early & being prepared for gigs a week or two in advance (and having played my show or at least recorded it before getting up to play it). This means being able to play everything I'm doing in my sleep, with fluency and perfection. This includes developing serious chops.
On a non-musical level, this also includes aggressively booking myself at venues (open mics, coffee houses, libraries, concert halls whatever) and aggressively looking for students & aggressively promoting shows and aggressively networking & communicating with the people who communicate with me.
I've been doing a good job about some of that over the last few weeks, but I have much more. I'm taking all the right steps, but I need to take more of them & take them better. I want to have a world-class technique some day ... I want to be exceptional & push the limits ... I have many hours of practicing before I can do that. I have to push my own limits.
My ultimate goal is to reach as many people in a meaningful way with my music as possible.
Time to get to work.
A lot about people, about music, about myself, life, etc. Many of those lessons have come in the past 2 weeks through financial difficulty.
One of the most important ones came a few nights ago after seeing Zoe Keating & Todd Reynolds play. This lesson has actually been coming for a while & it started with me actually practicing again & actually recording some of my practice. However, the LPR show was really the catalyst of it. Meeting a lot of buskers has also been essential to this change.
I've learned that I need to hold myself to a higher standard - musically and as a person. I've accomplished a lot in the almost 7 years I've been playing cello. I have a lot to be proud of and a lot to value. I've affected and inspired and moved people in all sorts of settings. I've created music, I've learned to improvise and play different styles, I've written a solo album, which I'm going to record soon, played in orchestras, musicals, etc, etc. BUT there's a lot I haven't done ... there's still a ton I have to learn. I've met and watched so many talented people recently and there is a level of musicality and technical proficiency I have not achieved yet. I've met a lot of "amateurs" who actually have a better technique than me or are better sight-readers or whatever. They arent' quite so boasty about what they do.
So I've realized, I need to hold myself to a higher standard. I need to practice more, I need to practice better, I need to record myself all the time & all in all I need to output higher than I do now. This includes things like always showing up early & being prepared for gigs a week or two in advance (and having played my show or at least recorded it before getting up to play it). This means being able to play everything I'm doing in my sleep, with fluency and perfection. This includes developing serious chops.
On a non-musical level, this also includes aggressively booking myself at venues (open mics, coffee houses, libraries, concert halls whatever) and aggressively looking for students & aggressively promoting shows and aggressively networking & communicating with the people who communicate with me.
I've been doing a good job about some of that over the last few weeks, but I have much more. I'm taking all the right steps, but I need to take more of them & take them better. I want to have a world-class technique some day ... I want to be exceptional & push the limits ... I have many hours of practicing before I can do that. I have to push my own limits.
My ultimate goal is to reach as many people in a meaningful way with my music as possible.
Time to get to work.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Maybe I don't need to be the same ...
I realized something in between the time I watched Zoe Keating play & now ...
Maybe I don't need to play cello the same as everybody else. I've always been really frustrated because my left hand technique barely looks anything like the really exceptional cellists I know ...
On the other hand, I'm able to play very expressively & able to move people (whether it's through my videos or live in a coffee house or at an Edensong show, etc.) ...
I also am progressively developing more and more precision/accuracy.
It's particularly when I improv that my technique goes kind of wonky ... it's also particularly when I improv that I feel free and able to be expressive (though at times I feel like I say the same thing over) ...
maybe it's ok to have a different technique ...
I'm not sure. What I do know is that I'm starting to improve & I'm really happy about that!
Going to sleep now so I can busk in the morning!
Maybe I don't need to play cello the same as everybody else. I've always been really frustrated because my left hand technique barely looks anything like the really exceptional cellists I know ...
On the other hand, I'm able to play very expressively & able to move people (whether it's through my videos or live in a coffee house or at an Edensong show, etc.) ...
I also am progressively developing more and more precision/accuracy.
It's particularly when I improv that my technique goes kind of wonky ... it's also particularly when I improv that I feel free and able to be expressive (though at times I feel like I say the same thing over) ...
maybe it's ok to have a different technique ...
I'm not sure. What I do know is that I'm starting to improve & I'm really happy about that!
Going to sleep now so I can busk in the morning!
Out of the Box & Future Plans
This blog post is a bit overdue ...
I put together a demo cd a few weeks called Out of the Box (available here: http://cellomike.bandcamp.com/) ... It's a combination of songs I've written over the last few years, 2 Irish tunes, 1 song from my upcoming solo album & 1 guitar/cello duet from a short-lived ensemble called Pejoratively Yours.
It's called Out of the Box, because I've never really fit into any box as a cellist, as a creator, as a person ... I always don't quite fit the mold/I always march to my own drum.
Some of the songs on it are part of a "Mythology Suite", which I'll some day complete ... the 2 irish tunes are two of my favorite tunes to play (I only heard The Moorlough Shore for the first time last month ... Sinead O'Connor's performance is incredibly inspiring)...
Anyway, if you record a cd it makes sense to tell people ... so here I am telling all of you!
I'm also planning on recording a few more demo cds to represent the different things that define me as a solo cellist.
These will be:
Single Track Acoustic/Electric Improvisations
Irish Tunes
Guitar/Chapman Stick & Cello Duets
Maybe other stuff ...
The point of these all is to start to get my music out there (and also to have some merch to sell at shows & have something to show to people for booking purposes)
Any money I make from these will go towards affording recording equipment, FX pedals, lessons, etc.
Any support is appreciated :)
I put together a demo cd a few weeks called Out of the Box (available here: http://cellomike.bandcamp.com/) ... It's a combination of songs I've written over the last few years, 2 Irish tunes, 1 song from my upcoming solo album & 1 guitar/cello duet from a short-lived ensemble called Pejoratively Yours.
It's called Out of the Box, because I've never really fit into any box as a cellist, as a creator, as a person ... I always don't quite fit the mold/I always march to my own drum.
Some of the songs on it are part of a "Mythology Suite", which I'll some day complete ... the 2 irish tunes are two of my favorite tunes to play (I only heard The Moorlough Shore for the first time last month ... Sinead O'Connor's performance is incredibly inspiring)...
Anyway, if you record a cd it makes sense to tell people ... so here I am telling all of you!
I'm also planning on recording a few more demo cds to represent the different things that define me as a solo cellist.
These will be:
Single Track Acoustic/Electric Improvisations
Irish Tunes
Guitar/Chapman Stick & Cello Duets
Maybe other stuff ...
The point of these all is to start to get my music out there (and also to have some merch to sell at shows & have something to show to people for booking purposes)
Any money I make from these will go towards affording recording equipment, FX pedals, lessons, etc.
Any support is appreciated :)
Monday, March 7, 2011
Zoe Keating & Todd Reynolds at Le Poisson Rouge
So first of all, it was raining ... second of all, there was a gigantic line that stretched all the way around the corner ... I've *never* seen like that before at LPR ... Thankfully the show started sufficiently late that I didn't miss anything.
LPR is one of my favorite venues, but the way they set things up was frustrating ... the tables in the middle were awesome, but that forces people to stand *behind* the tables ... no problem .. until you put couches behind the standing area. I spent most of the show moving out of the waitresses' ways or moving out of the couches way, it was annoying (also a result of combining two wildly different concert cultures ... rock music & classical). Besides that, it was really the perfect venue for this concert.
Let me start with Todd Reynolds. Todd's set really blew me away. The guy has a real virtuosic technique (but not in a show-off sort of way) & his music fused classical & blues & gypsyish styles & mixed looping with different FX, which really created a great result ... I've seen a ton of players play with a loop station & mostly, it's cool, but not thrilling ... this was thrilling ... not to mention, the lighting was amazing! I wish I could make it for his cd release at Issue Project Room next week, but I've got rehearsal. I really felt like he went beyond the loop station & really, truly created music. One thing that was really interesting to me was that in addition to using the loop station, he was triggering samples.
This was particularly interesting to me, because I have this solo album of music that I've demo'd and will record within the next 6 months (that is a promise) ... a lot of it is loop based or has multiple cello parts & I've debated whether I'd want to try to perform the songs live using sampling ... still not sure how I feel ... I'm going to start work on a 3rd solo cello piece in the very near future.
The lighting was also really amazing for his set!
Zoe Keating was a treat to get to see (and meet) ... it was cool to see her watching Todd play during his set ... it was also interesting to watching a performer who communicates with the audience, but doesn't necessarily have an extroverted stage presence. Zoe's music has been a big influence on me ... particularly on that album that I am going to be recording & I know most of her backstory that she's expressed in interviews, because I've read 'em all. It's really incredibly cool stuff & I'm long overdue to purchase a good loop station. it was also interesting to see the contrast in sound ... Zoe's sound was a straight-ahead pure cello sound while Todd used FX ... I think the use of FX may have something to do with why Todd's music grabbed me so much.
Still, there's something about a cello that reaches a deep part of me in a way that nothing else does ... especially about layered, harmonizing cello. It was also interesting seeing the parallels between Zoe's music & Break of Reality (who are also a big influence of mine) ... I have to say, it really impressed me a lot to see Zoe create some very similar music despite being one person.
A piece of her backstory I didn't know was that Zoe always wanted to be in an orchestra & that she always wanted to conduct. Also, when she worked an IT job and lived in a warehouse, she'd stay up really late playing cello and experimenting & developing her style. One of the things I find most intriguing is that Zoe plays into microphones live, she does not use a pickup. This results in really great cello sound (and is of course impossible to do in a rock band setting).
One of the most intriguing aspects of the show (and this is true anytime I go to see a cellist) was watching the way Zoe plays cello. The first thing that's apparent is the control and accuracy/solidness/fluidity of her playing ... a solidness that every cellist I see seems to have ... largely what separates the pros from the not-quite-pros (As Janos Starker once said, the thing that defines a professional is consistency). The next thing that caught my interest is that there are some parallels in our technique. First is that neither of us really plays terribly advanced thumb position stuff or incredibly complex fast stuff. Instead, we both make use of what the lower positions have to offer. Second is that both of us lift our fingers somewhat high off the fingerboard (though she has an accuracy with them that I can only dream of).
I think that's where the parallels end ... it's interesting to see the way she uses vibrato and the often lack of a legato melody in her compositions ... her playing and improvisation has definitely been tempered by the use of looping & it's amazing to see all the different ideas and motives she can put together in one song. In a way, she uses a very narrow (minimalist?) palette, yet she uses all the tools of that palette in a way that creates her completely unique style. It might be interesting to see her really tear into/wail on the cello one day, but she expresses herself in a much more refined way than that.
As I mentioned above, cellos really move me in a very deep way and Zoe's playing really stirred up a lot of deep emotions (some positive and some negative) ... it inspired me & reminded me that this is what I want to be doing, this is what I want to be: a performer & a writer ... it called my shortcomings and failings to mind and inspired me to try harder ... it also showed me new things that could be done that I hadn't considered ... mostly though, it uncovered the deep ugly, depressive stuff that's been holding me back and brought it to the top ... (which is great - music is supposed to do that ... that's where its healing power comes from ... it's also why it's so important to our world and society)
In a way, for me, Zoe's success is a beacon of hope ... all of my favorite performers had careers by now ... Metallica, Jackie DuPre, Steven Isserlis, Epica, so many others ... it's often hard to watch where I am and compare it to where my musical gods were at this time ... It's hard to accept that my path is different while simultaneously believing that it leads to the same place ... but here's Zoe, her career took a lot of time to develop & become what it is now ... she's in her 40s and it's just taking off in a big way... but more than that, she's been incredibly DIY about all of it (out of necessity) ... she's just gotten a booking agent for the first time (after 2 cds and a small US tour) ... she's had hard times, she's had good times, etc ... it makes me think that I can still achieve some sort of greatness and I can still build a career like this ...
Most of all, it inspired me to create and practice & this is what I need to feed myself on a regular basis ... I need to be a sponge & a hard-working sponge just like I was a few years ago.
(By the way, you should stop over at: http://ericedberg.wordpress.com/2011/03/07/we-drove-eight-hours-to-hear-zoe/ & read Eric Edberg's take on the whole night ... he has some really great, interesting & important things to say ... the thing that stuck with me most out of his post was:
" And that the lesson for us is that we cello teachers, and those of other instruments, need to spend more time developing our students’ imaginations and sense of possibility and less time pressuring them to learn concertos they will never perform."
I believe the same thing.
So, thank you Zoe Keating for the inspiration :)
LPR is one of my favorite venues, but the way they set things up was frustrating ... the tables in the middle were awesome, but that forces people to stand *behind* the tables ... no problem .. until you put couches behind the standing area. I spent most of the show moving out of the waitresses' ways or moving out of the couches way, it was annoying (also a result of combining two wildly different concert cultures ... rock music & classical). Besides that, it was really the perfect venue for this concert.
Let me start with Todd Reynolds. Todd's set really blew me away. The guy has a real virtuosic technique (but not in a show-off sort of way) & his music fused classical & blues & gypsyish styles & mixed looping with different FX, which really created a great result ... I've seen a ton of players play with a loop station & mostly, it's cool, but not thrilling ... this was thrilling ... not to mention, the lighting was amazing! I wish I could make it for his cd release at Issue Project Room next week, but I've got rehearsal. I really felt like he went beyond the loop station & really, truly created music. One thing that was really interesting to me was that in addition to using the loop station, he was triggering samples.
This was particularly interesting to me, because I have this solo album of music that I've demo'd and will record within the next 6 months (that is a promise) ... a lot of it is loop based or has multiple cello parts & I've debated whether I'd want to try to perform the songs live using sampling ... still not sure how I feel ... I'm going to start work on a 3rd solo cello piece in the very near future.
The lighting was also really amazing for his set!
Zoe Keating was a treat to get to see (and meet) ... it was cool to see her watching Todd play during his set ... it was also interesting to watching a performer who communicates with the audience, but doesn't necessarily have an extroverted stage presence. Zoe's music has been a big influence on me ... particularly on that album that I am going to be recording & I know most of her backstory that she's expressed in interviews, because I've read 'em all. It's really incredibly cool stuff & I'm long overdue to purchase a good loop station. it was also interesting to see the contrast in sound ... Zoe's sound was a straight-ahead pure cello sound while Todd used FX ... I think the use of FX may have something to do with why Todd's music grabbed me so much.
Still, there's something about a cello that reaches a deep part of me in a way that nothing else does ... especially about layered, harmonizing cello. It was also interesting seeing the parallels between Zoe's music & Break of Reality (who are also a big influence of mine) ... I have to say, it really impressed me a lot to see Zoe create some very similar music despite being one person.
A piece of her backstory I didn't know was that Zoe always wanted to be in an orchestra & that she always wanted to conduct. Also, when she worked an IT job and lived in a warehouse, she'd stay up really late playing cello and experimenting & developing her style. One of the things I find most intriguing is that Zoe plays into microphones live, she does not use a pickup. This results in really great cello sound (and is of course impossible to do in a rock band setting).
One of the most intriguing aspects of the show (and this is true anytime I go to see a cellist) was watching the way Zoe plays cello. The first thing that's apparent is the control and accuracy/solidness/fluidity of her playing ... a solidness that every cellist I see seems to have ... largely what separates the pros from the not-quite-pros (As Janos Starker once said, the thing that defines a professional is consistency). The next thing that caught my interest is that there are some parallels in our technique. First is that neither of us really plays terribly advanced thumb position stuff or incredibly complex fast stuff. Instead, we both make use of what the lower positions have to offer. Second is that both of us lift our fingers somewhat high off the fingerboard (though she has an accuracy with them that I can only dream of).
I think that's where the parallels end ... it's interesting to see the way she uses vibrato and the often lack of a legato melody in her compositions ... her playing and improvisation has definitely been tempered by the use of looping & it's amazing to see all the different ideas and motives she can put together in one song. In a way, she uses a very narrow (minimalist?) palette, yet she uses all the tools of that palette in a way that creates her completely unique style. It might be interesting to see her really tear into/wail on the cello one day, but she expresses herself in a much more refined way than that.
As I mentioned above, cellos really move me in a very deep way and Zoe's playing really stirred up a lot of deep emotions (some positive and some negative) ... it inspired me & reminded me that this is what I want to be doing, this is what I want to be: a performer & a writer ... it called my shortcomings and failings to mind and inspired me to try harder ... it also showed me new things that could be done that I hadn't considered ... mostly though, it uncovered the deep ugly, depressive stuff that's been holding me back and brought it to the top ... (which is great - music is supposed to do that ... that's where its healing power comes from ... it's also why it's so important to our world and society)
In a way, for me, Zoe's success is a beacon of hope ... all of my favorite performers had careers by now ... Metallica, Jackie DuPre, Steven Isserlis, Epica, so many others ... it's often hard to watch where I am and compare it to where my musical gods were at this time ... It's hard to accept that my path is different while simultaneously believing that it leads to the same place ... but here's Zoe, her career took a lot of time to develop & become what it is now ... she's in her 40s and it's just taking off in a big way... but more than that, she's been incredibly DIY about all of it (out of necessity) ... she's just gotten a booking agent for the first time (after 2 cds and a small US tour) ... she's had hard times, she's had good times, etc ... it makes me think that I can still achieve some sort of greatness and I can still build a career like this ...
Most of all, it inspired me to create and practice & this is what I need to feed myself on a regular basis ... I need to be a sponge & a hard-working sponge just like I was a few years ago.
(By the way, you should stop over at: http://ericedberg.wordpress.com/2011/03/07/we-drove-eight-hours-to-hear-zoe/ & read Eric Edberg's take on the whole night ... he has some really great, interesting & important things to say ... the thing that stuck with me most out of his post was:
" And that the lesson for us is that we cello teachers, and those of other instruments, need to spend more time developing our students’ imaginations and sense of possibility and less time pressuring them to learn concertos they will never perform."
I believe the same thing.
So, thank you Zoe Keating for the inspiration :)
Nowhere To Set My Aim .. So I'm Everywhere
It's time to set some things straight with myself:
I am a performer/creator first! This is what really matters to me in my heart ... I like teaching a lot ... I'd even say I love it, but there is *nothing* like getting up and playing in front of people & writing songs & playing gigs & doing sessions & improvising, etc., etc.
I feel very stuck and frustrated about 2 things right now:
1. I'm poor! Maybe poor is the wrong word ... but I'm damn low-income ...
2. I have a solo cd that is the most important thing of my life. It needs to be recorded and released ... right now, there is a big damn read light in front of it ... it's been put on a shelf in a closet that's blocked by storage bins ... it's long overdue & it hasn't gone anywhere ... I don't have the money or the equipment right now
I need that cd to happen ... I need it in order to build a career as a performer/creator playing original music ... I need that cd to start booking and selling and doing the things I really want to do and believe in.
Right now, I'm just stalling & trying to survive ... my cello playing is barely progressing at all ... I play frequently, but rarely get to practice. I am working on changing this. Along with this change needs to come creation ... I need to write new songs, new pieces, I need to stretch the limits of the cello
I have some really deep important things I want to say and some worlds I want to create & that needs to happen ... but I need to make some very substantial technical progress or I know I have no hope making a career out of this - as a teacher or as a performer ...
I've had the privilege of seeing some great players over the last week or so ... I need to achieve what they've achieved & I used to work damn hard at achieving it ... ever since my dad died though, ever since I've needed to really pay my own bills & now having my own rent, I have been utterly directionless with cello (except in some small, meaningful ways) ... it's time to move past that now.
I put a lot of time into networking and promoting my music/playing, but that's meaningless if I don't have solid music to start with ... and by solid I mean high-level (because everything professional is high-level), well put-together music that blows people away.
That's all for now ... I need to blog about Zoe Keating/Todd Reynolds soon ... that show was *amazing* ...
Edit:
I've started forming a cello plan ... long overdue.
Also, this means I need to really push myself to network and book as hard as I can ...
I have a demo cd up at http://cellomike.bandcamp.com ... and it sorta represents me, but I don't feel like it really does ... maybe I'm crazy!
Also, I think from now on, I'm going to call myself a Cellist/Songwriter/Teacher ... I think that covers what I do... I'm not really a composer.
I am a performer/creator first! This is what really matters to me in my heart ... I like teaching a lot ... I'd even say I love it, but there is *nothing* like getting up and playing in front of people & writing songs & playing gigs & doing sessions & improvising, etc., etc.
I feel very stuck and frustrated about 2 things right now:
1. I'm poor! Maybe poor is the wrong word ... but I'm damn low-income ...
2. I have a solo cd that is the most important thing of my life. It needs to be recorded and released ... right now, there is a big damn read light in front of it ... it's been put on a shelf in a closet that's blocked by storage bins ... it's long overdue & it hasn't gone anywhere ... I don't have the money or the equipment right now
I need that cd to happen ... I need it in order to build a career as a performer/creator playing original music ... I need that cd to start booking and selling and doing the things I really want to do and believe in.
Right now, I'm just stalling & trying to survive ... my cello playing is barely progressing at all ... I play frequently, but rarely get to practice. I am working on changing this. Along with this change needs to come creation ... I need to write new songs, new pieces, I need to stretch the limits of the cello
I have some really deep important things I want to say and some worlds I want to create & that needs to happen ... but I need to make some very substantial technical progress or I know I have no hope making a career out of this - as a teacher or as a performer ...
I've had the privilege of seeing some great players over the last week or so ... I need to achieve what they've achieved & I used to work damn hard at achieving it ... ever since my dad died though, ever since I've needed to really pay my own bills & now having my own rent, I have been utterly directionless with cello (except in some small, meaningful ways) ... it's time to move past that now.
I put a lot of time into networking and promoting my music/playing, but that's meaningless if I don't have solid music to start with ... and by solid I mean high-level (because everything professional is high-level), well put-together music that blows people away.
That's all for now ... I need to blog about Zoe Keating/Todd Reynolds soon ... that show was *amazing* ...
Edit:
I've started forming a cello plan ... long overdue.
Also, this means I need to really push myself to network and book as hard as I can ...
I have a demo cd up at http://cellomike.bandcamp.com ... and it sorta represents me, but I don't feel like it really does ... maybe I'm crazy!
Also, I think from now on, I'm going to call myself a Cellist/Songwriter/Teacher ... I think that covers what I do... I'm not really a composer.
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